It could be worse!

Wait a minute …. Don’t things always go horribly, horribly wrong after someone utters that line in a show or movie?

*shrugs* Ehn, whatcha gonna do?

I won’t get into the money aspect of the “bad side” of life. Because let’s face it, unless you are some rich person who can buy gold shoes for your pocket dog who never walks any where, chances are you have money trouble. And listening to others money trouble is, let’s face it, a giant bore! Instead, I’ll just say “yeah, I have money problems. But it’s more or less under control.?!.”

We have had nothing but rain (or at least it feels that way) for almost 2 weeks? Or about 5 days? I think it’s been below -5 about 2 weeks ago, but only as low as about 2 (Celsius, I am Canadian) since then? So of course my allergies and asthma still flare up from time to time.

It gets dark about 3:30, almost 4 now, and with the dreary wet weather I have found I just can NOT wake up. Not literally, more like I just want to sleep 24/7. BUT, here I am, almost 3am (again) and I still can’t sleep. Doesn’t seem to matter if I have no caffeine or a butt load of caffeine, nap or don’t nap. NOTHING seems to effect when I can finally fall asleep. (Usually around 4am)

I’ll knock on wood here, and say that I don’t feel like my depression is bad? I do feel snippy about some things, and I am trying very hard to push that deeeeeeeep down inside and not let it out on my family.

BUT, what is really amazing right now? What I am SAVOURING each and every time my period is due? My hysterectomy. If I believed in anything of “a higher power”, I’d probably be praying to it for making it happen. *snort* like my pushing and begging doctors every few years for the last 20 hasn’t had a THING to do with why it happened. pftt. No, I’ll take the credit thankyouverymuch!

Nope, recovery, minus the peripheral issues, was a breeze, if boring. Sure, technically I am still recovering, and 100% healing won’t be done for approximately a year. BUT, I had little big pain, didn’t even need the pain killers they sent home (which I shouldn’t take any way – asthma).  I still have the odd pain of I stretch too much, or move funny (or the kid freaking hugs me – he squeezes like most squeeze a lemon for its juice!)

BUT, while I have a bit of the back pain, ovary cramps (only one does that – cyst(s) scars), and stuff like that. But I am NOT getting the horrible cramps that need pain killers, I am not getting the rivers of blood and clots, I am not getting the wicked head turning mood swings, NONE of the nasty horrible stuff that made me want this in the first place!

I am LOVING my life without my inner bits. I hate them with a passion and even threatened to take them out myself! (I was darned close the last few!) Yep, it was beyond worth it.

NOW, I just need to make it to spring, avoid the depression, and life will be almost down right enjoyable. 😉

I would like my sleep to be normal though. But I had that before surgery, so it’s a work in progress.



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