It feels like I am running in place these days. I still am having trouble finding the balance in my life. When I am not working, I just want to sit and relax, not putter around the house. But I need to get off my ass and do stuff on my days off. My husband is trying, but has to do stuff around the park (mowing, and fixing, etc), so he isn’t usually in any shape to do things in the house after that. And trying to get the kid to do things, is like pulling teeth from a pissed of tiger with no anesthetic! You just don’t bother asking.
Doesn’t help that my IBS (or whatever the issue is?) has flared up in a huge way. My insides feel bruised and is just not fun.
The plus side of it all, I am down to 175 pounds (or approximately. My scale sucks, and isn’t accurate)! Even if I don’t know my weight? I DO know that my weight is going down. Clothes fit so differently, even new clothes and underwear is becoming baggier. I’ll say, it’s a good thing My husband is getting his LTD again, at this rate I will need to buy new clothes every month. ACK!
Life in general just doesn’t feel cohesive right now. No sure it’s a bad thing, yet. But I do need to find some sort of balance soon or I will burn out, and fast. I think if I could get my health fixed then the rest would fall in to place a bit easier. I just don’t know where to start with that.
For now, I will breath, and take it one step at a time.
I WILL get through this, I will beat the depression that is threatening (which is just weather, and health, once I am awake and not sick, it will go away???), and I WILL find a balance, some how.