An apology, and a complaint

If you follow me on Twitter or Facebook, you know I have been doing a LOT of whining lately regarding my health. But if you know me at all, New health problems bring out the worst whine in me. I admit, any time it comes to my health, I am great at “complaining about” or “talking through” my issues in a public way. Yet you’d be amazed how much I hold back. I can actually be quite private about that.

My assumption is I mask annoyance and fear with complaining. But I could be wrong. And this is where the apology comes in. I am sorry if you feel you need to read any of the posts I make, or if you feel I am looking for sympathy. Honestly, it is just a way for me to vent that doesn’t force it on others. (Hmm not a good apology I suppose? But I am truly sorry I have been so vocal about things lately!!)

As for the complaint? Well, that’s the health part, so feel free to skip this part.

I have had vertigo once before, while pregnant, and it was different from what I am going through now. This is a very weird “losing my mind” type feeling. The world wasn’t spinning, but tilted, a lot. My head felt like if I wasn’t careful it would float right off my body. Then, other times, it felt to heavy for my neck to support.

I may not “LOVE” working (I mean face, who wouldn’t love to have enough money to never work?), but I do enjoy my job, and I enjoy the people I work with. I am NOT one to just take time off work, not if I can help it. And the last few weeks I have taken so much time off I am surprised they haven’t fired me!

After my son gave me an AMAZING neck and shoulder massage for about 10 minutes last night, the tilting faded, and the floating/heavy head reattached to my body. BUT, the downside? My shoulder is now in a fair amount of pain, my whole arm actually.It is a combination pain (to compare to what I know) as my bursitis, and the pinched nerve. So, I now have a theory as to what is going on.

My theory, is the fall a few weeks back obviously jarred my body more than I originally thought. Not sure there is any real damage? Just aggravated existing (mostly healed) problems. I believe my body (mainly the neck and shoulder) tightened the muscles to protect the area damaged. And as the past has shown me, this caused problems with my oh so recently healed nerve(s). Having my son give me the massage was both wrong (as it brought out the underlying pain and problem), but very right for the same reason.

Thing is? If I had even an OUNCE of self-preservation (or a brain), I would have used the TENS machine I own, and been using it from day one. But I am now. I even looked up online to find proper placement of the electrodes so I could get maximum effect (affect? Damn it, to lazy atm to look that up. Sorry Cat, forgive me?). I do research to make sure I got ACTUAL placement, and not just some guys “hey, this are what werkd 4 me”. Found about 3 medical/physio sites that all showed the same, or at least close enough to be the same, information and placement charts.

I am not 100% sure I HAVE them placed correctly? but it sure as hell is doing SOMETHING! It has gone from “OH DEAR GOD MY ARM IS GOING TO BE DISLOCATED” to “Geez I wish this machine would stop punching me”. So that’s something? I think?

Ever have a part of your body that just NEEDED to be cracked? Like a knuckle, or neck (ha ha) so much so it felt out-of-place and really achy? THAT is how it is feeling now. Plus some tingling in my arm/hand as I assume the nerve wakes up.

I am using a lot of assumptions I agree, however, I feel safe doing so, again, based on my past experiences. I am using my brains and previous medical advise, as to what is going on. Plus, if I have any doubt, my Mom still has medical knowledge that helps. 😀

So hubby was up briefly, and I had him help me re-place the pads(electrodes) in their proper place, plus add 2 more (for a total of four on the go) and holy mother of fuck-nuggets!! Not so much pain, as it would be classed as … intense? It is making me wish for a second TENS machine so I could have my left side on the go to. I am finding that while the right side is the main problem, the left is feeling out of sorts not getting treatment. Sort of like if someone only massaged one side of your tense neck, like it needs to be cracked or something. An odd lopsided feeling.

Overall? I believe I have my solution.

I truly have the sort of mind-set that MUST identify the problem, find a solution, and fix it. I have that in almost all situations. Not fun sometimes, and probably why I have few friends. It’s difficult for me to just listen, I want to solve.

Ah well, works for me. And that’s what matters. (I’m learning that. 😀 )

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